EXCLUSIVE: Lana Austin Can’t Sit on Chairs

Original image credit: @plentifulpictures

LANA AUSTIN is one of the best wrestlers on the BritWres scene. The Mancunian has been spending years crushing all those that stand in her path.

She’s an incredible mix of beauty, strength and style - both in and out of the ring - which has helped see her gain a loyal following.

However, Grapple Theory can exclusively reveal that Lana Austin has a terrible secret…..she doesn’t know how to sit on chairs.

Now, this may seem like a wild and almost FOOLISH statement to make and yet Lana is not shy about trying to hide the evidence.

Anyone who follows Lana on Twitter will have seen her plug her OnlyFans page on the social platform. But, look closely and you’ll see that plenty of those promo photos see Lana use chairs as props - and yet she never sits on them. See some examples below…

No Lana, that’s not how you sit on a chair!
Credit: @lana_austin1/James Booth Photography

Three chairs and still no luck!
Credit: @lana_austin1/@splashpointphoto/@plentifulpictures

She was so close on this one! Just needed a 90 degree turn upwards.
Credit: @lana_austin1

And now it’s been confirmed to us by a source close to the star that these poses aren’t just for show, she really can’t sit down on chairs. She’s clearly never been taught.

The source exclusively told Grapple Theory: “Lana has always had a problem sitting on chairs. I’ve tried to bring it up with her but she always just calls me a loser.

“But I’ve noticed it for years. Everything we meet up for coffee, to watch Friends or go out for lunch, she always turns heads because she straddles the chairs in a very unconventional way.

“At first I thought it was bants, but now I’m worried for her. What if she’s never able to sit properly?”

We sincerely Lana gets the help she needs, if anyone knows any sitting coaches please put them in touch with Lana - we’re sure she’d appreciate it.

What an APRIL FOOL!

ps. go support Lana Austin’s OnlyFans and merch here